At 67, and on the post side of a heart transplant, you have time to think, and that time is sometimes filled with regret.
I have been a minister for 48 years. I was expected to encourage people, to lead people, to support them. When someone called, I would go. I am very familiar with the hospitals in a 50 mile radius. I am also familiar with the funeral homes, nursing homes, and even some jails.
But if I had it to do over, I would do it different.
My wife was in the hospital on a Wednesday night delivering our second son. I was there for her in the delivery room. I held her hand as she dug her nails deep into my wrist because of the pain. We rejoiced together with the arrival of a healthy baby. It was 6:45 p.m. I was expected to lead a service at the church at 7:00. She assured me that she was ok, and agreed for me to go. I taught the class and rushed back to the hospital. If I had it to do over I wouldn’t have left the room. Someone else could have led the service.
I was expected to help manage a camp for kids. It was, and still is a worthy project. However, this particular year, my wife had a hysterectomy during camp. When the time came I left camp and rushed to Lafayette to support her. When she was stable and doing well, with her consent, I rushed back to camp: “Because they needed me.” I wish I could have a “do-over” for that day as well.
I should have gone fishing with my kids more. I should have stayed home more, and told those troubled souls, (that I was not really qualified to help, but I had compassion on them) to go see someone else. I should have told more people “NO”.
I should have taken more vacations. I should have visited my aging parents more.
Now I live one day at a time. My wife and I spend a lot of time together. I enjoy sitting with her watching TV, or rocking on the front porch in our rocking chairs sipping on a diet coke. We will splurge and drive several miles to eat something outstanding like crab cakes. I could go on and on but you get the picture.
You may not relate to this, but maybe you do. Maybe you too need to learn that we need to set priorities. Your family is precious. Time is precious. When I pray, I always thank God for TIME. We don’t know how much time we have together, so we absorb time like a sponge. We use every minute of it!
